(Brian Molko, ๐๐๐๐๐๐.๐๐, May 31st, 2009)
๐๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ต๐ณ๐ข๐ฏ๐ด๐ช๐ต๐ช๐ฐ๐ฏ ๐ง๐ณ๐ฐ๐ฎ ๐๐ฆ๐ฅ๐ด ๐ต๐ฐ ๐๐ข๐ต๐ญ๐ญ๐ฆ ๐๐ฐ๐ณ ๐๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐๐ถ๐ฏ ๐ธ๐ข๐ด ๐ข ๐ฃ๐ช๐ต ๐ค๐ฉ๐ข๐ฐ๐ต๐ช๐ค. ๐๐ถ๐ต ๐๐ณ๐ช๐ข๐ฏ ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐๐ต๐ฆ๐ง ๐ฐ๐ท๐ฆ๐ณ๐ค๐ข๐ฎ๐ฆ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ๐ช๐ณ ๐ข๐ฅ๐ฅ๐ช๐ค๐ต๐ช๐ฐ๐ฏ๐ด ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐จ๐ข๐ท๐ฆ ๐ถ๐ด ๐ข๐ฏ ๐ข๐ญ๐ฃ๐ถ๐ฎ. ๐๐ฉ๐ข๐ต ๐ข๐ฏ ๐ข๐ญ๐ฃ๐ถ๐ฎ ! ๐๐ฏ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ช๐ด ๐ช๐ฏ๐ต๐ฆ๐ณ๐ท๐ช๐ฆ๐ธ, ๐๐ณ๐ช๐ข๐ฏ ๐ฆ๐น๐ฑ๐ญ๐ข๐ช๐ฏ๐ด ๐ต๐ฉ๐ข๐ต ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ข๐ถ๐ฅ๐ช๐ฆ๐ฏ๐ค๐ฆ ๐ธ๐ข๐ด ๐ข ๐ฅ๐ณ๐ช๐ท๐ช๐ฏ๐จ ๐ง๐ฐ๐ณ๐ค๐ฆ ๐ต๐ฐ ๐จ๐ฆ๐ต ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ต ๐ฐ๐ง ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ท๐ช๐ค๐ช๐ฐ๐ถ๐ด ๐ค๐ช๐ณ๐ค๐ญ๐ฆ ๐ช๐ฏ ๐ธ๐ฉ๐ช๐ค๐ฉ ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ฃ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ธ๐ข๐ด ๐ฎ๐ช๐ณ๐ฆ๐ฅ, ๐ฏ๐ฐ๐ต ๐ธ๐ช๐ต๐ฉ๐ฐ๐ถ๐ต ๐ด๐ฉ๐ข๐ฎ๐ฆ ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ธ๐ช๐ต๐ฉ ๐ข ๐จ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ข๐ต ๐ฅ๐ฆ๐ข๐ญ ๐ฐ๐ง ๐ฉ๐ถ๐ฎ๐ช๐ญ๐ช๐ต๐บ. ๐๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ฃ๐ช๐ณ๐ต๐ฉ ๐ฐ๐ง ๐ต๐ฉ๐ฆ ๐ฃ๐ข๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ธ๐ข๐ด ๐ข ๐ฌ๐ช๐ฏ๐ฅ ๐ฐ๐ง ๐ณ๐ฆ๐ฃ๐ช๐ณ๐ต๐ฉ ๐ง๐ฐ๐ณ ๐๐ณ๐ช๐ข๐ฏ ๐ช๐ต ๐ด๐ฆ๐ฆ๐ฎ๐ด.✨
๐ถ๐ธ๐ถ๐ธ๐ถ๐ธ
➡️ Placebo's time to reconsider has finally come: far from the routine and clumsy Meds, we rediscover a scathing and ambitious band, carried at arm's length by Brian Molko who has cleaned up his life. Even if it means finding corpses in the wardrobe.
Placebo has come a long way. From a black hole, bottomless, where the routine of excesses and abuses had pushed him to at the time of his last album, Meds. An album more comatose than medicated, with which the band - and a part of its public - came close to overdosing: unable to renew itself, damaged by its lifestyle, relentless tours and calamitous internal relations, Placebo had almost thrown in the towel. But Brian Molko was too attached to the band he had founded as a way out of a dull life to let it go. Since then, the trio has rebuilt itself, rediscovered the simple joy of playing, life without drugs or alcohol, a career without a major-company to rush it. A new label, independent this time, a new drummer, a new drive, a new hunger: it is a Brian Molko who is quite wound up and relieved to have emerged unscathed from these dark years who welcomes us to his home in London. On the new album, the ambitious and serene Battle For The Sun, we hear him sing "I need to change my skin". It was a good opportunity to ask him to bare his soul for a no-holds-barred interview.
Photo credit: Jean-Baptiste Quentin |
๐There's definitely a sense of rebirth. After Meds, we were at the end of our contract with our major label, so it forced us to ask ourselves the question: what do we imagine the future to be for Placebo? It was time to clean up, we were no longer happy in the band. If we hadn't taken the bull by the horns, we would have kept the band alive for a few years before an inevitable decline. I didn't sacrifice everything for fifteen years to let the group die slowly. When one corner collapses in a triangle, it jeopardises the whole balance. Here we were drifting apart, the creativity was suffering. Instead of standing together, as we had done in the beginning, Stefan (Olsdal, bassist) and I huddled together out of survival instinct. Placebo, instead of being a band, became a brand, a simple brand: I was compromised, without any sincerity, I felt like I was going to work, with colleagues who were less and less close to me. It was a simulacrum of democracy.
๐ ๐จ๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐ท๐๐๐๐๐๐?
๐During the recording of ๐ด๐๐ ๐... We left the studio with no pride, disunited, washed up. But there was a tour to provide, so we went to the front, as if nothing had happened. I hoped it would heal the wounds: it did. For two years on the road I was really lonely. I had no choice but to continue - I don't know how to do anything else, it's my destiny, my only value... With ๐บ๐๐๐๐๐, we then decided to recover our band, its spirit, the innocence it had when we were composing, in '94, in a council estate... We couldn't go on with this cynicism. Even on stage, we were pretending, it was no longer "us against the rest of the world".
๐ ๐บ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐,, ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐, ๐บ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ฏ๐๐๐๐๐. ๐ซ๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐?
๐At the end of the tour, we couldn't even look each other in the eye... He was... unpredictable, I was afraid of his reaction, emotionally and even physically. So I told him by email, and then our manager officially told him that he was no longer in the band. That was two years ago, we never spoke again. Since then we've recruited another Steven (Forrest) on drums, his youth, his hunger, his optimism as a young Californian has been crucial for us. He has "open minded" tattooed on his knuckles, and that's no joke. We needed him to get us out of our thirties, to make us into brats again.
Photo credit: Scarlet Page |
๐During the recording of the new album we forced ourselves to stay as far away from rock as possible, we only listened to classical music, or Fleet Foxes and Sรญgur Ros. It was important to live in a complete vacuum, to get away from our habits, from temptations - that's why we left London for Canada. It was a reaction to ๐ด๐๐ ๐, to its monochrome, claustrophobic, hopelessness - and also to its context of debauchery. I was dreaming of a more positive, colourful album, in technicolour rather than black and white... We felt a real relief when we finished ๐ฉ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ถ๐ ๐ป๐๐ ๐บ๐๐, we surprised ourselves, getting rid of our inhibitions... We needed to challenge ourselves. We've come a long way.
๐ ๐ซ๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ญ๐ญ๐ฅ๐ ๐ ๐จ๐ซ ๐๐ก๐ ๐๐ฎ๐ง?
๐Since our beginnings, fifteen years ago, there was never really any respite, a routine had set in: writing, then recording an album, then two years of touring, then six months of idleness... This time, the gap was even longer, because we didn't want to entrust our music to a major-company, we wanted to finance everything and do it ourselves. So the recording of ๐ฉ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ถ๐ ๐ป๐๐ ๐บ๐๐ in Toronto was a real joy, without a marketing manager in the back wondering if we had a single in the works... Even our manager didn't know what we were doing. She was getting bills - recording brass or strings - and was worried about what was going on...
๐ ๐จ๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐?
๐I need the public's feedback, their recognition. Right now, I'm in doubt, the vagueness, it's killing me. I need to be on stage, financially, of course, but above all psychologically. This exhibitionism is as necessary to me as eating and drinking. Without the stage, I couldn't be happy or fulfilled.
๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐: ๐๐๐๐ ๐ท๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ , ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐, ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐. ๐ฐ๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐, ๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐?
๐I have to be constantly busy. Solitude doesn't work for me, I can easily fall into total isolation. As a kid, I was already like that, on the sidelines, apart, alienated from others, even from my family. I used to lock myself up in my room, in Luxembourg, with my records and my guitar. It's very easy for me to relapse. I have to fight against that: having too much time to think can be very harmful for me.
๐ ๐ช๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐?
๐I don't go straight home, I keep travelling a bit, I come back in decompression stages. For two months, all I do is sleep. All the illnesses that I've managed to stave off for two years on tour then fall on me. I emerge from a bubble, I feel fragile, absent, reluctant to do anything... I'm not there for anyone, I shut down. On tour, every decision is taken by someone else, I become totally assisted and it exhausts me to be so dependent on others, I often wish I could cook for myself, do my own laundry... When I come back home, I regain some skills, an autonomy. Doing the dishes and cleaning becomes a necessity.
๐ ๐๐๐'๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐ท๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐. ๐ฏ๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐๐?
๐Since I was 14/15 years old, all the decisions I made in my life were in this direction: to find my way, through theatre, cinema and then music, to refuse the working world. Blindly, I believed in my lucky star. I remember myself, as a kid, sitting on the toilet, answering imaginary interviews... In my head, it was never a question of "if I am successful one day" but of "when will I be successful"... I burned all the bridges behind me for this dream. Living in my dreams was a form of protection. I felt totally divorced from society, I knew I couldn't fit in.
Photo credit: Radio XFM |
๐I had to, that was my response to success. I invented a very self-confident character, a bravado, a loudmouth - which was an outrageous exaggeration of myself. It's a way of feeling nothing, of fooling around with my lack of confidence, my self-hatred... And also of avoiding the clinical depression that has been following me since adolescence. Because if I could express myself through songs, I was unable to do so on a daily basis... But I had to end up killing this character, facing it. It happened shortly after the recording of Meds, which was a real orgy of drugs and abuse - it was our way of hiding from ourselves, of refusing to see that Placebo was in trouble... I was totally addicted to drugs and alcohol, I went to a clinic to treat myself (silence)... Four days after I got out of the hospital, I went on tour. In solidarity, Stefan also stopped drinking, it was the first time we toured sober, it was terrifying... After so many concerts drunk or stoned, I realise how much I disrespected the audience. Today, everything I feel on stage is real, whereas until now, all my emotions were distorted by what I was drinking... It only made me feel worse: I was on stage, in front of dozens of people wearing my face on their t-shirts, shouting "I love you" while I hated myself. I felt like shouting at them: "you wouldn't love me if you knew me"... Whatever mythology says, you sing better, you play better when you're sober... During the recording of the new album, in the studio, I was both physically and mentally present (laughs)...
๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐ ๐ฉ๐๐๐๐๐๐, ๐ณ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐, ๐ฌ๐๐๐๐๐๐ , ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐ฐ๐๐๐๐๐๐-๐ญ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐จ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐ ๐บ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ - ๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐?
๐From home I was torn: my mother was very religious, my father was a businessman and both, for different reasons, disagreed with my desire for an artistic career... So from childhood I had to carve out my own path, I knew that there was nothing to expect from others, that one day I would prove them wrong, that I had something of my own... It gave me the strength and determination to become myself. This uprootedness probably contributed to the fact that I don't feel at home anywhere. It especially encouraged my loneliness. I would have loved to belong to a culture, a family, a clique, but it was closed to me. That's why I formed Placebo: as a substitute family. It's not just a band, it's my reason for being.
๐ ๐ถ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐, ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐. ๐ช๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐?
๐It's not hypochondria, I just have to take a lot of medication to treat my depression. For a long time, when I was a teenager, I lived with this illness that had no name. It was at the age of 25 that a doctor finally diagnosed my depression. It was a relief to know that I was ill, that it wasn't something I did to myself, that I had no control over my emotions, over my permanent sadness. The only positive thing is that I tried to overcome the illness through creativity, hoping to find a form of therapy. You can't imagine what a relief it is to finally know that you're sick, not crazy.
(๐๐๐๐๐๐.๐๐)
๐ถ๐ธ๐ถ๐ธ๐ถ๐ธ
๐ถ ๐ฐ'๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐ฒ๐๐๐๐ ๐ณ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐ด๐๐๐ ๐บ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐ญ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐๐๐๐ ๐๐๐๐ ๐ถ https://bit.ly/3CdQfEW
Translation by Laetitia Evalia
Post by Laetitia