This was a French radio show, on Europe2 (19.09.2003), early in the morning.It used to be filmed on Fridays because they received stars. The animator is Cauet, and he is surrounded by severals chroniclers. There is also an unknown band playing jingles “live”.
For this show, they received Sandrine Quettier
and Gael Leforestier, Cathy Guetta, Passy (a French singer) and of course Brian
and Stef.
The part that interests us starts at 6.00,
Cauet is welcoming Brian and Stef
6.00
Cauet: Do
you like Rock?? Do you like moving? So please welcome, and it’s a great honor
for us, I’m really delighted because they’re about to start a French tour and
more, everywhere, really everywhere…. Eh, some people in the crowd have their
mouths on the floor!!!! Please welcome Stefan, guitarist and bassist, and Brian
Molko, Ladies and Gentlemen, PLACEBO!!
[Standing ovation!!]
Cauet: How
are you? Good morning!
Yes I know,
it’s a bit noisy for a morning, doesn’t it?
Brian: Yes,
too much noise!
Cauet:
Could you make less noise please in the audience!
Brian:
Yeah, we’ve just woken up!
Cauet: In
fact, it could be worse. Oh [to the
public] you can sit down now! Because they stand up just like “oh my god,
they’re here!!”
How was the
wake up?
Brian:
Awful!
Cauet: That
means?
Brian: that
means I’m not awake yet!
Cauet:
Someone had to shake you?
Brian: Yes, yes,yes! This morning, yes!
Cauet:
Well, how to recognize a rock band around the table? That’s easy, in 2 seconds,
you see it [Brian and Stef are the only
ones to wear sunglasses!]. For those who don’t know you, it’s done!
So, you’re
going to tour all around France!
Brian: Yes
Cauet: Ok,
you don’t seem to be shaped! So you’ll be on October the 15th in
Lille. Do you want me to tell you about them? The Lillois (people living in Lille!) are just great! Rennes on October the 16th,
they’re great too. Paris on October the 18th. “Parisienstêtes de
chiens” [it’s a French expression, just
because it rimes to say Parisians are always in the skuls. You can translate it
as “Parisians, dog heads”!] But Parisians are great! October the 20th
in Metz. Metz is just wonderful! They’ll try to make you drink a local thing,
which is called “La Poire” [The Pear, is
a local alcohol, very strong]
Brian: The
Williams pear?
Cauet: If I
can advise you: never ever drink it before a gig!
A
chronicler: Otherwise you would play the guitar in other ways!
Brian: Is
that your experience?
Cauet: We
did a show in Metz in front of 4.000 people, we can’t remember the last 20
minutes! We saw the video, and couldn’t believe it was us!
Then you go
to Lyon.
Brian: It
looks like absinthe. You should never drink absinthe before a gig either!
Otherwise you start to hallucinate!
Cauet: Oh,
really?
A
chronicler: I see people everywhere!!!
Brian: yes
yes, you could wonder what are you fucking doing in front of 4.000 people!!
A
chronicler: What are you fucking doing in my bedroom?? Get out!!
Cauet: But
what is your little ritual before going on stage? The legend is that artists,
(which it’s true in theater) but maybe in rock and roll too, before going on
stage have a glass of any alcoholic drinks there is. Is that your case?
Brian: It’s
much more vodka tonic I think!
Cauet: Do
you send a prayer? Are you joking? A little prayer with a big glass of….
Brian: A
prayer to Satan! Hail Satan!
Cauet: and
you drink something before?
Brian: Of
course! A big thing!
A
chronicler: For 4 hours before the gig!!
Brian: No,
we never start drinking until one hour before the gig! That’s a rule.
[end of part 1]
[the unknown band is covering The bitter End,
changing the lyrics]
Cauet: Be
careful, Placebo is listening to you
Wait, wait!
I'll take advantage of the presence of Brian Molko and Stefan Osdal to…
Unknown
singer: What you do is disgusting!…
Cauet: Yes
I know, I’m such a motherfucker! But, if you want the band [the unknown band] to leave, send “1”, if you want the band to stay,
send “2”!Guys?
Brian:
Huhum…
Cauet: Oh,
shame on the[unknown] band!!
Unknown
bassist: We can’t see because of the sunglasses! But he is crying!
Cauet: Of
course, I’d rather say he’s laughing to death!
Welcome
everyone it’s 9:38 a.m!
Cauet is announcing people around the table:
Passy Cathy Guetta, Sandrine Quettier, GaëlLeforestier.
Then please go to 3.15 ;-)
Cauet: And
the ones who honor us to be here, with a crazy album, a crazy single, a crazy
tour! They have kept their sunglasses because they looked at the tour they are
about to do. When will the tour start globally?
Brian: Next
year! Next summer precisely. We’ve started in March, and we'll go on until next
summer [we are in September]
Cauet: Is
it okay? Are you in good health?
Brian: Not
really! [laughs]
Cauet: Do
you want a coffee? What is the secret to keep on going on tour? Apples?
Brian:
Apples and vitamins! And do not get interviews before midday [remember, it’s early in the morning! It’s
9.40 a.m!]
Cauet: I
don’t know what you mean, it’s 12:40, our guests for today: PLACEBO!
So Brian,
let’s talk a bit more about you! First, I’m surprised you speak French so well.
Brian: Oh,
why?
Cauet:
Because, everyone told me “you’ll see he speaks French like you and me!”. Since
I first thought about bringing a translator my English is really bad…
Brian:
Well, I live in London but I grew up with the French tv, the French cinema…
Cauet: Oh,
what’s your favorite movie? “Les visiteurs” ? [laughs]
“La dernière heure” ?
Brian: Yes, with 2 or 3 vodka tonic and it works !
Cauet: Ok,
if I do that, I enter the stage and fall!
Brian: Does
anyone want a vodka tonic here?
Cauet:
Really?
Brian: I’m
joking!
Cauet: A
vodka tonic for Brian please, Does anyone want a sandwich? [laughs]
So, what’s
your worse memory on stage?
Stef: Falling
on stage!
Cauet:
Falling?
Brian: We
recently did a gig with Metallica, in Italy, in a festival, during the first
song, I received an apple in my balls. The of the gig was horrible!
[Stef is actually eating an apple!!]
Brian:
It was that apple. We checked it!
Stef: It
tastes good!
Cauet: Oh,
you mean an apple, violently sent, at a rattling pace?
Brian: Violently, yes. There were also sandwiches with ham, even bottles of pee on
stage! That was absolutely …
Cauet:
Bottles of pee???
A
chronicler: It must be basic fans of Metallica… But it might mean “I love you”
in a hardrock language?
Cauet: But
you received the bottle or it fell near you?
Brian: No,
we got hit by it! There were severals bottles, we all received bottles!
Cauet: And
all men listening to us right now are thinking that if they had been you,
receiving an apple…. OUCH!
Brian: Yeah
yeah! It vibrates.
Cauet: Were
you about to sing or already singing?
Brain:
While singing the first song!
Cauet: Did
you go on or did you stop?
Brian: Of
course we did go on! That’s rock n roll!
Cauet: It
must have been very violent!
Brian: Yes!
I’d like to
say hello to my brother who’s listening!
Cauet:
What’s his name?
Brian:
Stuart! I love you Stuart. Everybody give it up for Stuart Molko!
Cauet: I
send him a message too. Stuart, if you listen to the show, does he speak French
or just English?
Brian: He
speaks French very well.
Cauet: Ok,
I speak English just for the show!
Stuart, if
you are listening to this show, “his bubbles are very cool” [he wants to say his balls are ok, but he
really speaks bad English!] bullocks are ok after the apple! Ok, he still
has 2!
Brian: My
bullocks are very fine! Thank you very much!
Cauet:
Well, for anyone coming from far far away, who could say… “hum, Placebo?? What
is that?”
They play Pure morning on the radio…
Cauet (to the unknown band): Hey, the band! In
two minutes, you’ll play in front of them!! Aren’t you scared???
The unknown
singer: Maybe we’re not going to do it!
Cauet: Yes,
you’re gonna do it! What are you going to play in front of Placebo?
Brian: Is
that a Les Paul special you got here?
The unknown
singer: It’s a Gibson Les paul.
Brian: It’s
a Gibson Les Paul, yeah but is it a special one, or a custom one, or what is
it?
The unknown
singer: No, no, a normal one! It’s one I
managed hardly to buy!
Cauet: Of
course, if at any moment, you want to try his guitar… that being said, I won’t
say anything more! It’s up to you!!
Stef: No,
no, no….
The unknown
singer: My guitar is yours!
Cauet: I
just say if you want to try this guitar……..
Brian: No,
because I don’t have any guitar picks with me!
[The unknown singer is showing one!!]
Cauet: but
if we can find one?
A
chronicler: You want a pick?
Brian: I
never play guitar before noon.
Cauet: Half
past noon, good morning! Wake up, it’s half past midday!
(to the unknown band) Seriously guys, what are you gonna
play in front of Placebo??
The unknown
singer: I'll save it for later on!
Cauet: Ok,
keep on rehearsing guys!
Do you know
Cathy Guetta? Have you ever been to one of her clubs, especially the strip
tease one?
Brian: A
club of what?
Cauet:
Strip tease
Brian: No,
I’ve never ever been to such an establishment in my whole life!
Never,
ever!
Cauet: Why?
Brian: Look
at me, do you really think I’ve never been to a strip tease bar?
Cathy
Guetta: Ooh, and we had to organize a party for you…
Brian:
really?
Cathy
Guetta: Yes, the record company had asked for it but it hasn’t been done. But
I’d be glad to do it!
Brian: Maybe
you can do a little strip tease this morning!
Cathy
Guetta: Me??
Cauet:
Cathy, on the table! Well done Brian! It’s great to tell the girls to go on
stage, but what about you??!!
Cathy
Guetta: I have to answer never before midday!
Brian: I
totally understand!
Cauet: What
is the fuck with midday? We can live before midday!
They make a pause, “stay tuned, blablabla”
;-) End of part 2
I think the whole video has been cut… they are
back but the interview has already started!
Cauet: What’s your favorite movie?
Brian: Blue
Velvet by David Lynch.
Cauet: And
in French?
Brian: My
favorite movie: “La Haine” by Mathieu Kassovitz (French film, you can see it here http://youtu.be/F-Pd0RJhuxU , just to see Brian’s favorite movie!)
Cauet:
Questions “how many times a day”. How
many times a day do you smoke cigarettes?
Brian: How
many cigarettes per day? It depends on the situation.
Passy: In
studio?
Brian: In
studio? Cigarettes?? [he laughs] I don’t know, maybe 10.
Cauet: oh,
that’s ok. You’re ok, 10 cigarettes, not 10 packs!
A
chronicle: No 10 cartons!
Cauet: How
many joints per day?
Brian: 2 or
3.
Passy: In
studio!
Cauet: How
many times a day to you play your guitar?
Brian:
Which one?
Cauet: The
one you prefer.
Brian: Once
a day.
Cauet: How
many times a day do you French –kiss?
Brian: To
whom?
Cauet: To
whom you want to!
Brian:
Pfff, less and less these days. It’s sad!
Cauet:
What’s happening? Why? It’s not normal! It should be the opposite! It should be
a festival!
Brian:
Well, to be honest with you, I’ve already done that for 10 years, I’ve played
the little rockstar asshole and I got weary of that a bit now.
Cauet: Oh
yes, it’s too boring, asses, asses, asses!
Brian: I
rather talk to people now. I think the
conversation, the speech is sexier than many other things.
Cauet: Than
sex?
Brian: No,
of course it’s…
A
chronicler: The finality
Brian: Yes
Cauet: But
you talk to get it.
Brian: Yes!
Intelligence gives me a hard-on, more than physical.
A
chronicler: Funny, Cauet you’ve not taken this step!!
Cauet: Yes,
because I’m not a rockstar! Brian has passed the physical beauty. I’ll get
through… one day! But right I'm still focusing on the physical part!
Cauet: So,
how many beers per day?
Brian: I
don’t drink beer.
Cauet: How
many CDs per day do you listen to?
Brian: 5 or
6.
Cauet: How
many times do you pee in a day?
Brian: 44 !
Cauet: 44
times!! You must consult a doctor!
Brian: Yes,
an urologist!
Cauet:
Right, so here is the new album, Sleeping with Ghosts, and there is Bitter End
on it. And I extend my invitation again to try his guitar! Because let me
remind you it’s 43 minutes past midday now. You’ve said never before midday. So
I think now it’s ok!
Brian: No,
not the guitar. It’s not gonna happen man! [he already says that in English]
Cauet: Here
we are, to say no, you speak in English! Can't you say no in French? Even to
play the guitar?
Brian: No,
me , no. Maybe Stef!
Cauet:
Stef?? It seems we won’t need to push Stef a lot!
Brian: Ok,
ok, (talking to Stef) If you play the
guitar, I’ll play the drums, ok?
Cauet:
Let’s go! Just the time for them to settle.
[talking to
the unknown band] Hey guys, get out, hurry up, let the real musicians work! Hey
Jean-Bapt (the unknown band bassist) is gonna have the honor to play with
Placebo!!
Brian on drums and Stef on guitar are covering
Satisfaction!
Cauet:
Ahahaha, Jean-Bapt was in his corner saying “Do I dare to play or not??....” !
Whatever, bravo, well done! Thank you.
Cauet speak with the other guests, I don’t
translate it because, really, it’s not interesting! Lol. They speak of a French
tv show which doesn’t exist anymore (and I’ve never heard about it before!!!)
It continues until the end of part 3
And even at
the beginning of part 4!
Cauet is interviewing Gael Leforestier but in an
awful way, he has eaten some cheese, an onion, French black pudding, and speaks
really near to Gael’s nose! At the End Gael is rebelling and smash the cheese
on Cauet’s face!
Then please go to 1.15 ;-)
Cauet: Oh,
please excuse us!
[Brian is speaking in English to Stef but we
cannot hear what he’s saying]
What are
you saying Brian?
Brian: Do
not start throwing cheese at your faces, otherwise it’s gonna turn bad!
Cauet: Oh
no, we’re not that kind, we have never ever done anything like that in this
studio!
Brian you
can be sure we’ve never done that!
Brian: Ok,
I’ve never done it either. I know it’s not midday but…. Don’t tempt me with
that!
[…]
2.22
Cauet: You
have to tell me something guys, I’d like to get back on this song “Met ton
doigtdansmoncul”.Could you tell me
more?
Brian:
Well, it’s a song called “Mars Landing Party” and we thought that when our
civilization… Hum… When we can no longer live there, on this planet, because we
are actually using it as an enormous bin, we’ll go to Mars, and that will be
the song people will play!
Cauet: You
really think people will sing “put your finger in my ass” on Mars?
Brian: Yes!
Kiss me, put your finger in my ass, an ambiguous presence, an unknown presence,
until I can’t anymore!
Cauet: What
beautiful lyrics! This idea of “Kiss me put your finger in my ass”, is that a
real situation or a fictional one?
Brian: It’s
a total fictitious one!
Cauet: So,
in a few minutes, because it’s hard to find, we’ll have a little excerpt of it!
So don’t move we'll come back!!
Cauet is trying to speak English, in fact he is
pretending to speak English! But it doesn’t mean anything!! ;-)
4.53
Cauet:
Please, Stefan and Brian!!!
Are you ok?
Brian: Yes!
It’s ok, thank you very much (he’s saying
that already in English with just a big big French accent!!) !
Cauet: Are
you more awake?
Brian: A little bit, yes!
Cauet: Do
you want me to wake you up every morning?
Brian: Do
you really want me to answer that?
Cauet:
Every morning, I come to your room, unless
it’s too messy, I hate messy rooms! But if there are naked bodies
everywhere, I come into your room, with cheese or something, and I can come
when you want to wake up!
How is it
under your glasses?
Brian:
Don’t call us, we’ll call you, ok?
Cauet: Oh,
I know you won’t call me!
I’m back on
their song “Kiss me put your finger in my ass”.
Brian: Not
before midday!
Cauet:
Great, I won’t be before midday! No, seriously, it’s very hard to find this
song!
Brian: Well
it’s a Pure Morning Bside.
Cauet: ok,
so it’s not on any album?
Brian: No,
it’s a Bside, just a sex-joke!
A
chronicler: And the music doesn't sound like you!
Brian: Yes,
we felt so French that day!
Cauet:
Listen to the result, when Placebo feels a bit more French…
Mars Landing Party is playing
A
chronicler: Do you play it live?
Brian: Are
you really allowed to play that on radio here in France?
Cauet: Yes,
of course! In England, they wouldn’t play it?
Brian: No,
no, no, not at all.
Cauet: Oh,
you can even, put objects!
A
chronicler: Add some sand or gravel!
Cauet:
Things that scratch, a bit! No problem!
Brian: Why
not a French black pudding?
Cauet:
that’s France! That little I don’t know about
Brian: The
little Bah-dah-boom! Yes!
Cauet: Here
is the Placebo album!! And they’ll perform everywhere in France!
He reminds the tour dates . Good luck guys, it’s not gonna be
easy!
Brian:
Thank you.
From 8.00
to the end of part 4 Cauet speaks with the other guests.
Part 5 goes on with Cauet speaking to the other
guests and it’s the end of the show
Please
go to 1.30
Cauet: Have
a nice week end Placebo, my friends!
Brian:
Thanx a lot.
Cauet: Good
luck, really, because the end is far away!!
I just want
to say you thank you very much for waking up for us because I know you’re not
used to it! Are you awake for the whole day?
Brian: It
does seem like it yes!
Cauet: What are you doing after? What is waiting for you?
Brian:
eeeehhh…. Pffffffff….. !!! [he laughs!]
Cauet:
Stuff
Brian:
Yeah, some stuff!
Cauet:
Well, good luck again and thank you for having played the drums and the guitar!
Brian:
Thanx to you
Cauet: It’s
been a great “pure morning”…
Brian: Yeah
baby!
Design and photos by SusanneCk
Placebo Anyway
